I cannot remember the last time I actually celebrated Christmas. Went out and bought a tree and did the trimmings. The holidays are very akin to land mines in my house. You’re just waiting for someone to take a misstep and there she blows.

There is this awesome Christmas tree farm close to my house where you can walk the fields and cut down the tree you choose yourself. I only got to do that once with my dad and brothers. Now that I’m thinking about it, I’m pretty sure that was the last time we had a tree in the house for Christmas. That was back in middle school, so over ten years ago.

I’m also really close to biting the bullet and quitting my job out at Disney. I feel it is going absolutely no where and just leads to anxiety and stress.  But it has been my standard for a work environment for so long, I’m wary to give up and walk away.

For my future, I want stability and ease. Independence. The ability to stand on my two feet, live by myself and feel like I don’t owe anyone. An apartment of my own with just me, decorated by me and no roommates.

I don’t share share living spaces easily. After just a couple days of spending the night at someone’s house, I start to go a little crazy. Irritable. Depressed. And if it was the rare occasion where it was the other way around, I would be antsy by the end of the first night.

But back to Christmas, I want to be able celebrate and decorate for Christmas next year. With my own car. My own tree. My own home. Settled and ready to nest in.

Drafted and posted using my Samsung Galaxy SIII. Please do forgive any typographical errors.


2 thoughts on “Wishes

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